Monday, June 1, 2009

Young Love

My son just broke up with his girlfriend. In itself, not a particularly unusual event--except that he is 11 (technically 10 when the big break-up occurred). He had 'gone out' with his girlfriend exactly one week. Actually they never went out anywhere together besides school. However they did manage to have virtual dates via the cellphone and computer. I 'caught' them watching t.v. together; both in front of their televisions in their respective homes, giving each other a 'play-by-play' over the phone. I guess I should be thankful that they weren't practicing phone sex. Although I can't be sure. 

We often hear how 'times' are different--more danger, more violence, more drugs, more sex....We often hear how the media is to blame--violent video games, explicit sex on t.v., porn on the internet, etc... Well I'm blaming texting. After one day, my son is texting his undying love for his girlfriend. I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER. I LOVE YOU, BUT WE MIGHT NOT BE MEANT TO BE TOGETHER, SINCE WE WILL BE AT DIFFERENT SCHOOLS NEXT YEAR. In one week, he managed to send and receive over 200 texts on a phone with no text plan. I am told that this is not a lot of texts. However given that he does not have his own phone and is only home and awake for a few hours each day, this seemed excessive. 

I wanted to know how you could love someone you just started going out with. He explained with exasperation that THIS IS HOW IT'S DONE MOM!  Apparently you declare love first and then get to know your paramour. At first he refused to divulge the reason for the break-up. I was totally surprised and unprepared for the reason. It wasn't because he liked someone else or stopped liking her. He found out that she SMOKED.  How could she smoke? She's 10. Where would she get the cigarettes from? He said that he could not be with someone who smoked, because it would be like kissing an ashtray. (he totally ripped off that line from me)

He will have the summer to contemplate his ex as he works to pay off that texting bill. 

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